~ CHOSEN to be His ~

          This few days was great or should i say Epic-ly Awesome!!! lolz... After 2 years plus, i'm back for the Easter Rally Concert, also known as ER! I've been missing a lot of it in that MIA(missing in action) years. Every bit of it, i honestly miss it dearly.. It was a great experience to experiencing it again. It was like a big message to me. To be his instrument in any ways that He wants me to be. To do anything that He wants me to do. I believe He is great that He always surprise us in an unexpected ways. He do things in His own ways that we all can never understand sometimes and when we expect that everything will turn bad and ugly, at the last moment He will definitely do His MIRACLE. All we need to do was to believe in Him... I believe that is all what He wants us to do, to believe in Him. I really thank Him for everything that He has done for me and how much He had taught me and shown me in this past few years of my life while serving Him. In or out the ministry, He still guide me to do what He wants me to do. To be Chosen by Him again this time to serve Him in a different way, was a big pleasure for me. I praise Him and thank Him alot for it. I believe it was not by chance but personally hand-pick by Him. As i reflected back on everything and think back on how all this started, i smiled and said that this is what He wants me to do. To be on His side, to be with His people, to be His instrument for His work.


          It all started back in year 2005... I was in the school marching band that time. Kinda a rascal... a little troublesome and most of the time, hard to handle kinda kid. ER05 was about to start about in a week or two. That time i din't know what was ER all about and what was that concert for. I think i was tagging along with my friends. I've been to masses a few times and what caught my attention was the musicians. I've always enjoyed how the musicians played in church and i usually closed my eyes listening to them. I felt so in peace and start talking in my heart sometimes. Since then i've always dream of playing the guitar and to serve for masses. But i never know how and never asked anyone about it. As all the ER preparation was going on, i ended serving in the security team. Whole ER i enjoyed meeting lots of different people and friends. How i even started to be there in the first place, i have no idea at all. Why am i saying this is because... FYI, i'm not a catholic. I'm an SDA which stands for Seventh-day Adventist. To be honest, i don't know much about it. All i know was we don't pray for Mama Mary, we don't wear a cross which i'm the only one who wore it and we don't eat a few type of food which i'm not sure and i don't practice it myself. I was always with the catholic ever since i was a kid. I studied at St.Theresa Padungan and was at the kindy there too.


          Every time after school i will always go to the church to help those Sisters to mop the entire church, clean the bench or i'll just play around the church compound. But mopping was what i like to do the most. I will flood the entire floor and just make my own water park in there. It was fun... The sisters will just shake their head and smile. Hahaha... im just too naughty.... But i enjoyed wasting my time there. Till i ended my schooling days there, that is what i do most of the time. So roughly that is what my background of myself was. Back to the ER05..... As i mention earlier, i din't really know how it actually happen and started. But i believe it now that He called me to join Him and His crew. After ER05 ended, i continued to get myself involved with the rest of the people. The only person that really knew there was Joshua Erron and Ben@Mr.Ben! =P(He is my band teacher and still now.....) One fine day, i followed Josh to sunset mass practice. I was tagging along and i was bored so i joined him. I sat there at the bench and watched them practice. Sam suddenly approach me and asked me this.. "Jim, can you help ka?"(Something like that...) and i said "Yes, what do you want me to do?" then he just put this LP conga in front of me and asked me to play. I feel so blur but excited for a while. But the thing is i never played one before and i'm not even a drummer or percussionist. The only instrument that i know how to play that time was a little bit of guitar and more to trumpet. So, sam showed me a few move and basics and there i go. Ended serving for mass that evening and since then, i journey with the empowered ministry.


          The whole experience to be there when everything happened was more than what you can say in words. ER06 was my first concert on stage, KAYD, WYD and a few more events till 2008.... After that year, i left the ministry for studies and personal problems. But i never regretted to be part of all this and i believe i will always be in it in any ways that God wants me to. After i left the ministry, i continued my life like usual... No more busy or compact time for me. When i was at the ministry, 80 percent of my time was with them. They are like my second family and St.Joseph church, Gallery, Youth Room and all it's surroundings are just like a second home for me. I enjoyed myself so much to be part of it. Home - College - Church - Activities(empowered family).... That is what i do all the time. It happened too often that at one point my parent was questioning me about what i'm doing. As how i mentioned before that i'm not a catholic, right? So, to be this busy with church till night and almost all the time, it kinda feels not normal for my family.(I THINK!) Owh, FYI, Mom is a buddhist and Dad is a christian, SDA. So i was baptist but not as a catholic. So roughly i think you get where i'm trying to bring you. Not much details i can give but yeah....... Obeying parent is always the number 1 priority. I practice that... Even my ministry leader taught me that. I was with the ministry for 3 years plus and it is out of my own will and i feel very close and  homely to God in my heart. Thats why i was there. But nothing comes easy in life right? Sometimes there is a time we must go and just obey... But i've made a promise to myself that sooner or later i will be back.


          In this 2 years plus when i'm away, i seldom be in contact with the ministry. Very seldom going to church and that is it. Just like that.... At first it felt so free... but as time past and years gone... i felt like i'm stuck... Not going anywhere at all... I felt like i'm missing a lot of things which i'm not sure of myself... It was kinda hard i guess... But you know, God never gave up on me. He always send someone to come to me and reminded me all the time that when i'm ready, please come back. He even taught me to be strong and always try to depend on Him. He guided me all the way... I'm really grateful for that. You know, no matter how far i run or how i think i might be lost somewhere, He will always personally come to me and guide me back. I believe God wants me to do something for Him. To asked me to be His instrument and to share His news to others out there. Cause no matter where i go, He will always come and be with me. He chose me.... and hand-pick me  from the very beginning even before i knew it. I believe He has something in stored for me..........


          I believe i'm choosen to be His... as anything that He wants me to do and what He wants me to be. Because, out of everyone out there... HE chose me to be with Him and asked me to join Him with all of His crew member to serve Him in all the task that HE has given us. How i ended to be the security, entering my 1st gathering, more in between that i cant remember, ended playing for mass and lastly serving Him in a more serious manners... I believe it is not by chance.. But He personally chose me and YOU to do it for him. I believe you will feel the same..... If this is not by Him, then there is nothing more i can say. To be part of His project in this life now, i would saw it's really a great pleasure to be on board. We are all in this together! Not alone but with Him as our captain. Try to think of all that you have gone through from the beginning till now... Is it by chance or what??? I believe it is part of what He have plan for us. We also have plans on our side but He is the person to decide everything. Without Him, there is no You or ME and definitely no US... Right????? Many more to learn and more surprises awaits us... He is just so great that nothing can even compare to Him. When you think it's all dark around you, He will light it up. When you think there is no way to go and stuck, He will make a way for you. He will make everything impossible to be possible. Amen? =)   


1 Peter 2:9 - But you are the chosen race, the King's priests, the holy nation, God's own people, chosen to proclaim the wonderful acts of God, who called you out of darkness into his own marvelous light.
 

Floating Mind....

          Are we satisfy with most of the things in our life now?? Do you think you have everything?? Pretty much maybe?? Well i bet the answer would be a NO right? Cause it's a typical human nature to want things. We tend to get bored of our current items and wanting a new set of it. But one thing for sure that  i'm sure we all wont get bored of.... Jesus. Common, how can we get bored of him?? Tell me?? He practically gave us everything.... Everything that we ever wanted in this universe. Life itself and his unfailing love! and that is what i keep in my heart the most. Without life, we wont even be here and without his love... I'm sure we will be so depress right now with everything that is going on in our life. But you know.. Its sad to see sometimes that some of us, see things in a more down-ward way... When there is a problem, we want to solve it with any short cut ways that we can find... and usually not in a good ways. We have everything in our body.... Hands, Legs and vice-versa.... Sometimes we are just too lazy to act accordingly and just take everything for granted. Some think that life suck.. well, i cant judge on that cause it's your life.
          Once few years back, i watched this video on youtube about this guy who do not have a complete body part. Man! he love his life so much and enjoying every bit of it. Nothing is too hard for him but us, we complain a lot. He said that every problem has a solution. Nothing is impossible... It's just a matter of, IF we wanna try to solve it or not. If you fall.... get up and try again. From that, we gain... right? I gave up many times in my life. Sometimes i just don't know what to do and i just drop everything and thats it..... i felt ashamed of that. We all who have perfect body parts and gets most of everything we want, but still we complain about it. Some even said this life suck. Well again, how do we know it is suck? What do we know about it? We barely sometimes even knew what life suck really are. How suck is our life compared to others that maybe have sucker life than us? hmmmm??? We human sometimes just make our life more complicated than it already is.
          You know... In all this thing that is happening everyday in our life... We always forgot one thing. To pray... We never have thought of that most of the time. Right? I bet so... Cause it happens to me too. We always take prayer for granted. We never know how powerful prayer can be. But some only pray when they are out of options. I mean it is not wrong but you know, to put God as our last option is really sad... It's like we only needed him when things goes really bad and ignore him when everything are good. If you are in his shoe, how would you feel?(can't even be Him =P) I mean what if a friend do that to you....???? Find you when he or she need you and ignore you when all if fine. Get the picture? I bet you will feel sad right? Actually we should always pray even when we are in a good or bad moment. Cause all event that is happening around us, is all part of His plan. I try to make it a habit to pray everyday. All the time in my own ways... Still learning but it's worth to try. Talk to Him all the time and you'll be surprise how he will answer you back. I'll share with you one of my experience.......
          Few years back when i was attending this local university somewhere.... I meet a bunch of new friends. Love that place and it's all good during the first week. Get to know more about my roommates and we became close. During the orientation week, it felt like we are attending army camp. GOSH!!! Torturing.... They are harsh and rude at times and really like to boss around.(Our facilitators...). Towards the end of that week, they told us that they purposely did that just to get us prepared for our seniors that are coming back the coming week. They said for some, it might be hard but that is it is now. Senior bully the new bird.... at first i thought it is not that serious but one fine night when i was not around during that weekend, my roommates got bruises most of their body parts.(No need details on this i guess.....) i felt sad and decided to stay with them the coming week and so i did. That night, a group of senior went to our room and locked the door.. They asked us to do whatever they wanted us to do. As much as i hate whats going on, i just obeyed them. We don't want to create a scene and we just follow everything that they told us to do. At one point one my friend start to defend himself. To be honest most of us are ready for a big royal rumble in that small room. I've been praying hard in my heart from the moment they entered our room. I prayed that the Lord send anyone here to clear all this and end it. A few second before the royal rumble begin, one guy appeared.
          I was shock that i din't know what to do. One of their friend came in and told them that it's enough and just go back to your own room. So the other senior did as told... That guy sat down and told us to relax and apologize on their behalf. I was so relief and breath really hard on the floor. You think that the guy appear just by chance? To me i don't think so. I really thank god that he hears me and helped me at that critical moment. This is one of my most unforgettable experience that ever happened to me. Who says Jesus din't hear you... HE will answer you in his own ways and that ways sometimes will make you doubt and you know why you doubt? it's because his ways are too unreal to you that you doubt what you see.... Right? That is what i call Surprises! He always surprise us in his own ways and that what makes it beautiful. So guys.... Pray to Him everyday... In anything at all... Talk to Him... it's like praying too by just talking to Him. He is always there with us.. next to us... all we need to do is just to allow him to enter. Thats all.... I pray that everything is all well and may He continue to guide me, you... in everything we do in life. Cause without him, there are no this and that.. no you or me.... He gave us everything so it is right that we thank Him all the time for everything. Amen? yeah? Bless you guys always and you know, i pray that he will always use us as his instrument to do his work.... It's a great pleasure to become his instrument. =) In his name i pray, Amen! 

Flashback : 8th December 2008....

          Fine day.. Sunny and not too hot in my opinion. Today i woke up quite early, about 7 am i think... Laze around for a while and get myself clean up for the day.. I went back in to my room and grab my bible and opened this small book of mine. It is a note book given to me by Ben 3 years back. What i like about this book was the front cover, "God's Messages". Usually when i do some random thinking, i will jolt something down in that notebook. So, as i turn the page i saw this personal sharing of mine in there. I always love it everytime when i read it. It happens when i was kinda lazy that day in my room... Looking at the wall and saw this group of ants... I cant help it but stares at them the entire time... Not long after that, i brought my lazy ass up and took that notebook and start pouring some thoughts of mine in. Here is what i wrote 3 years back.....
          "10.42 am   ........................................  8/12/08
     Was looking at the ants one day in my room. I noticed that the ants only choose one path for them to go forth and back. If we looked at it closely, there are no road or line there for them to "walk/crawl(whatever)" but they always managed to stay in line no matter how the line goes. Either by group or solo, they stick to one route only. I've been noticing it for so long that it makes me think of something. In our journey with Jesus, we create a lot of road for ourselves. We got separated everywhere. He provided us with one nice and bright road but still sometimes we tend to go astray. He has make it easy for us and gave us one simple order.. Follow this road and it will lead us to Him. But still many of us never obey but create our own road which we don't know if it will lead us to Him or not... Cause in our road, we do not have the foundation to keep our road strong and smooth but for some they might make it. Sometimes, we liked to do things in our own way that we eventually get lost and the most dangerous part is that we might can't find our way back. But the good thing about our Lord is, His road is the brightest among all. So no matter how far we are, or how lost we can be.... just find the brightest light there and it will lead us back to Him............................. Which road are we walking now? How do you feel about your own road? Ask more about it..............."
          This is what i wrote back then. I'm a deep thinker myself. I think a lot most of the time even when you are talking to me. I liked to observe and see things around me. See the world around me... I don't know why but that is what i do most of the time. When there is a question or sharing... I liked to link it to my own life. It makes me easier to understand it in my own words and ways. I know that sometimes i might not make any sense but that is how i think it is. It's like this sharing that i wrote up there, i used my own imagination to make it out as words. After i wrote this, i opened the bible and John chapter 14 was on my mind. Reading through it and i think few verses that caught my attention can be use here for this sharing. Most of the time we are worry about ourself. We worry about many things...almost everything to be honest.... But in this chapter Jesus told us not to worry. He asked us to believe in Him. He will prepare everything for us. All we need to do is to believe in Him. That road there, He build it and asked us to just follow it and it will lead us to Him. Believe in Him and we can do greater things in life. There is no need for us to find alternative... He prepared it.... and all we need to do is just follow it.... That simple and thats it... We do what He do and you'll see the fruit out of it. Relate it to anything thats happening in your life... Trust me that in the Lord, we find peace in our heart. There is nothing greater than Him. Amen? Although sometimes we might think that what we are doing or trying to say doesn't make sense at all, but believe me, He understand it.... Eventually everyone will get it... He will work everything out in His own way and in His own time. =)

Pslams 23

Was looking at my bible last night.. I pick up a card that my friend gave me for christmas. Pslams 23:4 was there... I opened my bible and as a bookmark at that pslams 23 page was a pslams 23 bookmark. It kinda hit me for a while... So i read that whole pslams 23. I was thinking, you know... try not to be afraid when you wanna do things in life sometimes. If it is for your own good or it is for something good, why not and what are you afraid for? Was having difficulties these days with decisions for fearing that it might not be the best. I mean how do you know for sure right? Only the Lord knows what is best for us. All we can do is to have a little faith and go for it and asking guidance from the Lord. If it was meant for us, we will be okay in it and who knows, might be doing so well too. It is always easier said than done. That little faith in us are usually just there cause of us fearing of using it. We sometimes scared to act.... Failure was the biggest word that stop us from doing so. But you know, if we just dont give up and learn from mistake, the Lord will do the same to you too. He always will... waiting for us to act and He help us from behind and guide us. All you need to do is to believe in yourself, trust yourself and Him, have confident and have a little faith to start everything up. =) Amen, and with God's blessing.. You will do great. Amen? =) 

1 The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside the still waters,

3 he restores my soul.

He guides me through the right paths

for his name's sake.

4 Although I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I fear no evil,

for you are beside me:

your rod and your staff comfort me.

5 You spread a table before me

in the presence of my foes.

You anoint my head with oil;

my cup is overflowing.

6 Goodness and kindness will follow me

all the days of my life,

I shall dwell in the house of the Lord

as long as I live.